I thought it over the entire day of New Years Eve. As much as I hated to admit it, the kid had connected to me on a level deeper than any of the other guys I had dated within the past 2 weeks. I couldn’t stop thinking about him and he admitted the same frequent thoughts of me. We agreed to spend the first day of the year together.
He came over and we embraced each other as though we hadn’t seen each other in years, when in reality it had only been one day. Again, his embrace felt so comfortable, unlike the uneasy, unsure embraces I had received from other potential suitors.
Throughout the day we did some rather mundane things: ate breakfast at iHop, watched a movie, worked on the computer, took a nap, played some video games, etc. What is astounding is that it seemed like we had been doing these things together for the last two years. Like an old couple.
There was one red flag I must mention: during a conversation, he mentioned he knew a 6′ guy I was interested in dating. When I prodded further into the matter, he confessed to “doing stuff” with the 6′ guy a couple weeks prior to meeting me. This shocked me because the 6′ guy was emailing me the very next week asking to see me. I confessed to the kid that I was worried I would wind up with the same fate as our 6′ friend. The kid seemed ashamed and asked me to just trust him.
He more than gained my trust with his next set of actions:
Instead of going out to dinner, we went grocery shopping and bought the ingredients for some simple hamburgers and potatoes. Then, we stayed in the kitchen and cooked together. He told me he had never done this domestic routine with anyone else before.
For the very first time since I had moved into my apartment, he had managed to make it feel like a home.
I was enamored with him.
After eating a unique ice cream concoction together, he sat at my computer and finished his report while I memorized my lines. Then we went to bed, as though we had been doing it this way for years.
Readers: am I crazy? I’m afraid I’m getting too attached too soon, but what if I’d be doing myself a huge disservice by denying it?
Filed under: People, love, relationships
I certainly hope you’re receiving different perspectives on this conundrum via e-mail instead of comments; I’d hate to think I’m the only other person giving input regarding it. That might be rather worrisome. *smile*
I’m going to continue to be cautiously optimistic on your behalf, as I was in my last comment to you regarding this conundrum. (And keep in mind also that the difference between you and me in terms of our respective ages and our respective relationship experiences has quite a bit to do with the cautionary tone of my advice.) There is certainly no reason not to explore anything that “could develop” between you two; to not explore the possibilities could very well end up being a disservice to you both. And after all, no matter what happens between you two, you can both always treasure the experiences who had with each other. However, I think the trick is to be able to reap the happiness experiences with him bring you, without making yourself too emotionally vulnerable…too soon.
But you already know that.
Atherton: No one is really lining up to take my case. Luckily, my sole (soul) compass is my heart, not the advice of others. Thanks for the great advice anyhow.
Cautionary woes aside, I am truly enjoying what we have started. I think this will be the first time I won’t hold back in a relationship. He and I both believe in not having any regrets. I’ve been accused of being an idealist and it looks like I’ve found an idealist match.