How do I always manage to get myself into these career conundrums?
I have been placed on my 2nd administrative leave due to the fact that I “liberated” some color copies from my workplace without paying for them. Sure I’m not the first employee to have done it, but I am one dumb enough to have not outsmarted the security system by now — and now I’m paying for it.
The sad part is, I hate my job so much that I was more than happy to be excused that day. I swore I’d never return and set my sights on some graphic design jobs that were hiring that weekend. Like a castaway on an island sending out messages in bottles, I sent out my resumes and hoped they’d return with good news.
The following day, I went to a competing copy shop and had my portfolio printed. I noticed, as I walked home with my copies in hand, how much I loved not being at work. Well, not just work, but work at FedEx Stinko’s. Stifling is the best work I could come up with to describe the situation there. Though I’ve never been in one, I would compare it to being in prison: being fenced up in there for the rest of your life changes people. I didn’t like what I was becoming: a yawning drone who took no pride in what I did. It’s scary to think about that glass cieling, so I was more than happy to separate myself from it.
Now, one week later, with no job offers in sight, my freedom is started to scare me.
To cure my desolate disposition, I’ve started drumming up new freelance design work. In the week I’ve been away from work, I’ve managed to secure a week’s worth of pay with one job and I have two or three big jobs in the pipeline that I’m waiting to close in on. I’ve even managed to join a Small Business organization (a $175 investment!) and write an article that has been submitted to publications for PR purposes. In addition to incessantly peddling my resume to anyone seeking someone with my skills and rehearsing for my play, you could say my time away from work was spent, well, working.
It might be that special Scorpio Spunk I have, but somehow I always managed to bounce back from such strife. It ain’t easy though, sister. It ain’t easy.
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From reading your previous posts on jobs and career, I think one of the things you probably need to do before leaping into another job you hate is thinking about exactly what it is you want to be doing, what type of ideal work environment you see yourself in (i.e. what type of supervision, schedule, etc.), AND what is your plan to get to the ideal job you want with the ideal environment you want.
One of the things that’s tough is finding out that you can’t get to the ideal job overnight. And, I think you probably realize that already. A lot of us need to start at the bottom and work our way up — But, a lot of how we work our way up affects if we get to the ideal destination we want to go to.
Sorry, this is so long, but this inspired me to leave a comment because I’ve been in similar situations to yours before. But, once I came up with a plan and was able to look at my past jobs and mistakes I had make objectively, it really helped.
Thanks for the feedback, Tom, but I do know what I want out of a job. Unfortunately, unlike our mainland counterpart, Hawaii isn’t swarming with opportunities that match my ambition.
I have a very intimate vision of what my perfect job situation would be, but it’s because of this vision that my boyfriend teases me about being an idealist.